Sometimes it hits like a punch.
There you are, trying to plan and prepare.
...and all at once, you're hit.
This feeling that it's all been for nothing.
That you haven't accomplished what you thought you had.
That no-one understands... or cares.
All your hopes and dreams and aspirations are nothing but dust and ash ... and clutter in someone else's eyes.
And your heart breaks.
It seems pretty basic to realize my business is to work on me.
I remember being told once (several times really), "It's not all about you."
I finally answered, "Actually it is. Because I'm the only one I can change. So I have to concentrate on that. Becoming a better person, learning from my mistakes and downfalls... If I'm not working on that, then I'm not growing and that is really all I can do."
I remember the shocked look I got.
- I am good. Gen 1:31
- I deserve. Galatians 4:7
- I am chosen. John 15:16
- I am of value. Luke 12:7
- I am protected. Psalm 121:3
- I have what it takes. Philippians 4:13
The struggle is real
So often, I think we forget where the real battle is. ...or that we're actually in a war.
We want to concentrate on our blessings or set in discontent concentrating on the things we want, rather than what we have... Either way, we miss that we are at war and in a battle for our very souls.
Yes, salvation is there for the acceptance. That doesn't mean the enemy doesn't keep trying to trip us up and keep us from being all our Creator has made us to be. None of us are meant to only "be saved" but to also be the "light of the world." (Matthew 5:14)
"If you look at the world, you'll be distressed. If you look within, you'll be depressed. If you look at God you'll be at rest." ~ Corrie ten Boom
It's okay to hurt
Allowing ourselves time to feel the emotions is part of working through the hurt and beginning to heal.
For me right now, it's living through the brokenness.