Why do I hesitate to follow through?

Sometimes I’m full of ideas and ready to take on the world. Then all of the sudden, I sit down with the keyboard in front of me and that blank screen and I go blank. These days I’ll even have a tendency to tear up and wonder what I’m doing here. Why am I writing? Why do I even have the computer on? Aren’t there a dozen other things I should be doing? Will anyone even care what I have to say?

For Heaven’s sake girl, get a grip! You had a great idea. You have set aside this time. Didn’t you get some wonderful comments last week? Let’s get this ball rolling!

It’s been a few months since I posted. Can you believe the year is going by so fast already? We say this every year don’t we? As we grow older, time seems to speed up. For me, the past few years especially it’s worse for the first six months. I start January with all these plans, goals, and great ideas. Then things just seem to fall apart. By May, I’m totally overwhelmed. It’s the first week of April as I write this and I have made a decision to never plan anything for the first of the year ever again! LOL. I’m not sure how that will go. I’ll try to post an update next year. I think it’s not a totally bad idea though. 
I think it’s good for us to have an idea of what we’d like to accomplish but it’s really hard to be flexible and have set goals at the same time. 

I’ve been watching the fad of “Word for the Year” for the past few years and have noticed what I think is a trend. People seem to be moving to words like, “Intentional”, “Grow”, “Flourish”… Those are very open-ended words that can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people. My word for this year was Simplicity. As usual, the Lord is making sure I’m adequately challenged. I find myself almost half way through the year thinking, “Lord, I had this great plan and these wonderful goals. What am I supposed to do?” I feel like He’s saying, “Duh… Simplify!” So I’m stepping back and taking another look from another angle trying to figure out what my next step needs to be.

Why do I hesitate to follow through? Why do I always seem to be second guessing myself? I have so many reasons to confidently follow my dreams:

• I know I can do it. (I can do all things through the Messiah who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13)
• God gives me words to say. Obviously not everything I say is from Him or with His approval. I’m still working on that, but when I let Him speak through me, I don’t have to worry about what to say. (Matthew 10:19, Luke 12:11, Mark 13:9-13)
• I know people appreciate me. My husband often comes home telling me he met someone who said something I posted touched them. I also get comments and emails of appreciation. God’s word always hits the mark. If someone needs a word from Him, He will make sure they get it, usually from more than one or two sources. I’m blessed when I hear I was one of His tools. (Isaiah 55:11, 2 Timothy 3:16)
• I’m inspired and creative. (Genesis 1:27)

So, when I hit this little brick wall, what is it that causes me to freeze up? Most things that hold us back from success are doubt and comparison. They can both be crippling. The Bible verses above help me not doubt my purpose or ability. I also know and embrace my uniqueness. I can’t say I never get caught in the comparison trap, but it happens much less and I tend to catch myself much faster the older I get.

So, when that blank white screen is staring at me, what makes me hesitate?

Sometimes I get overwhelmed at how much I’ve been blessed. Even when "my" plans fall apart, I always know things will be fine because HIS plans always produce results far beyond my expectations. I don't always see results in the time frame I'd like. As a matter of a fact, being the impatient person I am, HIS time usually seems unbearably slow to me. Our blessings aren't always what the world counts as success or prosperity. Our blessings are very simple, yet very fulfilling. I'm seldom concerned with being too busy or too tired. Yes, I get busy, but it's with simple things that can easily be set aside at any moment. Yes, I get tired, but I have plenty of opportunity to rest and recuperate in between spurts of business or catastrophe. We have a very laid back life that doesn't rely on a day-to-day grind of frustration I see most people struggle with.

When I set down to write. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by the fact that I could be writing to that person who is struggling with who-knows what. What can I say to encourage her and let her know God cares? Yes I struggle. Where is the balance between whining about my struggles and bragging about my blessings?

I share my struggles AND my blessings here to let others know that no matter what your struggle is, God has blessings in store for you. {Click to Tweet}